"I'm sorry, what?" Lilah cocked her head with the same impish grin she always wore. I, on the other hand, fumbled over my words while my cheeks burned with red.
"My mom is... she's uhhh... asking if you would like to come to my cousin's wedding in Niagara Falls with us."
"Why?"
She almost seemed cocky- she always did.
"Because you're a friend of the family." I spit out quickly, stepping over the curb as we crossed the street. "She likes you more than me."
"Oh, so she wants me to be her plus-one? Seems a little weird, dontcha' think?"
"Actually, no." I managed to mumble. "She's taking a friend from work. She's forcing me to take somebody and she wants it to be you."
Lilah smirked. "Why me? Surely if she wants you to take somebody, the amazing Henry Jacobs has other friends to take to a boring wedding."
I scowled with a side-eye stare. "You're really going to make me say it, aren't you?"
Her knowing grin could light up a billboard. "Absolutely. So, I ask again, why does she want me to be your plus-one?"
The sigh that escaped my lips was filled with a mixture of defeat and deep embarrassment. "Because she thinks we're dating."
"There it is!" Lilah laughed loudly as we approached the roundabout. When she did, her pitch-black ponytail swung and grazed the top of one of her shoulders before doing the same to the other.
"It's not what you think!" I said. "She wouldn't stop bugging me about trying to find a girlfriend. 'Girlfriend' this and 'girlfriend' that. 'I had my first boyfriend when I was fourteen, how come you are twenty and still single?' Ugh. It's exhausting."
Lilah crossed her arms over her chest and playfully nudged me with her shoulder. "So your first instinct was to lie to her and say that I was your girlfriend?"
"Well, I tried Tinder a few times, but it never worked out. Since Mom wouldn't shut up about it, I figured the best course of action was to say that we were dating just to get her off my back."
"Okay then, new question. How long have we been dating, honey?"
I winced and brushed a few strands of shaggy blonde hair out of my eyes. "I told Mom last November."
Lilah's eyes widened and her mouth was held agape in a smile of mock disbelief. Her dark freckles were almost the same shade of chocolate as her eyes. Perhaps just a touch darker, but they still showed clearly even on caramel-tinted skin. "No fucking way, we've been dating for a year and you haven't told me?"
"We aren't dating!"
"Hmph. It's a wonder you haven't proposed..."
"Lilah! We. Aren't. Dating."
"Well, apparently we are, since that must be the reason why your mom invited me to join you two at every holiday dinner since last year, and why my parents let me."
I cocked an eyebrow. "Wait, what?"
Lilah draped one arm over my shoulders as we walked, which was easy since we were pretty much the same height. "We're neighbours, dumbass! You think our parents don't talk with each other? The day you told your mom we were dating, she told my parents, who asked me about it. I just played along."
"You knew this entire time and said nothing? What was with the entire conversation up to this point?"
She grinned and leaned her head on my shoulder. "Do you have any idea how fun it is to fuck with you? You get all red in the cheeks and you tuck your head into your shoulders like a turtle."
I pushed her off, but returned her smile. "You're a prick, you know that?"
"Hey now," she began, "you're the one who lied to your mother, I'm just having some fun with the consequences. So what about this wedding?"
I sighed. "All you have to do is say that you can't make it. Just say that you have to go visit some family of your own or something."
"Why do I have to do it?" She questioned.
"Because I already tried, and she won't believe me. If she hears it from you, then she will."
"Why not just tell her the truth that we aren't actually a couple?"
"And admit that I lied to her for almost a year because she was being annoying? Pass."
Lilah stretched her arms above her head and leaned back, which helped to accentuate her figure. One of the consequences to growing up with a female best friend was watching her develop into a beautiful young woman. She was slender but toned thanks to her years of little league soccer. Her body was shaped well underneath her dark red hoodie and black skinny jeans, with gentle curves and supple breasts. They were small but seemed to be fairly well shaped- perhaps a B-cup at most. Did I have a crush on her? I used to. Did she know that? Absolutely. Did she seem to care? Not at all.
"Why not lie and tell her that we broke up?"
"She likes you too much. I think that might actually kill her."
Lilah rolled her eyes. "You know this charade is going to meet an ugly end eventually, right? The longer it goes on, the worse it's going to be when our parents peek behind the curtain."
"I'll burn that bridge when I get to it. For now, can you just tell Mom that you can't make it to the wedding?" I pleaded. Lilah sighed as we turned the corner on the sidewalk and began walking up the driveway to my house.
"Fine. But you owe me. Anything else I need to know?"
"Mom was thinking about inviting you out for breakfast with us tomorrow. Again, all you need to do is say you already have plans."
Lilah frowned. "You know I'll be cashing in these favours sooner rather than later, right?"
I laxed in relief and unlocked the front door. "I'll take whatever I can get. Just... please."
Mom called out the moment the door opened. "Henry! How was the movie?"
Before I had a chance to open my mouth, Lilah chirped up with a wicked smile. "It was great, Mrs. Jacobs!"
Mom almost sprinted around the corner wearing her house robe, and I could only hold my head in shame. Her long hair was the same blonde as mine, broken by a few streaks of pale grey that mine lacked. Her equally blue eyes sparkled, and the faint trace of early wrinkles in her face vanished under her smile.
"Lilah!" Mom cried gleefully and approached, pulling her into a tight hug as if it had been three months since they had last seen each other, instead of three hours. Over Lilah's shoulder, Mom's blue eyes glared daggers at me.
"Henry, why don't you go get a drink from the fridge for Lilah?"
"Root beer please, sweetie." Lilah grinned. I had to keep from cursing under my breath as I kicked off my shoes and stepped towards the kitchen. Over my shoulder, I could tell Mom lowered her voice as she quietly spoke to Lilah, but she was still so excited that I could easily hear them both.
"Sweetie? That's new."
I swear, I could hear the shit-eating grin on Lilah's face even around the corner. "Yeah, we kept it really casual for a while, but we talked and we're ready to start taking things a bit more seriously. He's actually taking me out for brunch tomorrow."
I winced, but removed the requested drink from the fridge. Really? Her choice for alternate plans was a date?
"Oh really? He and I were planning on having breakfast tomorrow. He never said anything about a date."
"Oh, well if you two have plans, then we can easily reschedule..."
"Nonsense! You two enjoy your date. Has Henry told you about the wedding?"
I could see Lilah's feigned curiosity when I stepped back into the room. "What wedding?"
The death glare Mom gave made me silently vow to slap Lilah. "Henry, I've been telling you to ask her for weeks."
"I just-" Mom cut me off by turning back to face the resident shit-disturber.
"Henry and I are going to my nephew's wedding in Niagara Falls the day after tomorrow. I know this is extremely last minute..." Mom's dagger-like stare made a bead of sweat form on the back of my neck. "... but I was wondering if you wanted to come with us as Henry's plus-one."
Lilah tilted her head like she was remembering something. That, or dumping the bullshit out of her ears.
"Right, my parents mentioned that you two were gonna be gone for a few days. They never said anything about me coming with you, though."
"Well, I wanted Henry to be the one to ask you, but obviously he still hasn't after a month. You'd think that he would care at least a little bit."
"Mom..." I fumbled for a lie that seemed more appropriate than 'I didn't ask her because we're not dating'. "I figured she wouldn't enjoy it. It's just a dusty old wedding, and I don't want to force her to do something she'll hate."
I passed Lilah her drink. Unfortunately, Mom seemed intent on winning this battle. "Henry, that is her choice to make, not yours. Ask her."
A sigh escaped my lips while I looked between the two women. One glaring like she was going to beat me with the business end of a flip-flop, and the other trying her hardest to keep from laughing out loud. I stared my friend in the eyes.
"Lilah, would you like to come to Niagara Falls with me for my cousin's wedding?"
Lilah's smile dripped with her classic impish charm. "I would love to."
When the door was carefully closed, I turned back to Lilah who made herself comfortable sitting on the edge of my bed while sipping her drink.
"What the fuck, Lilah?"
She chuckled. "What? Did I do something wrong?"
"All you had to do was say you had plans, and then you wouldn't need to come to this wedding."
"I don't have plans, and I want to come."
"You do?" I raised an eyebrow. Lilah set her can on my nightstand and lied back on the bed, spreading her arms out towards either side like she was trying to make half a snow angel in the wrinkles of my comforter.
"Yeah. I don't have anything to do, and this genuinely sounds like it will be fun. Three days in Niagara Falls? Count me in."
"You do realize we're going to have to pretend to be dating the entire trip, right?"
Lilah winked. "That's what's gonna make it fun."
"You're an asshole." I smiled and sat down on the bed beside Lilah, looking down at her.
"Again, I'm just enjoying the consequences of your actions."
A moment of silence passed. I scratched the side of my face.
"Did you have to use a date as your way out of breakfast tomorrow?"
Lilah propped herself up on her elbows and grinned. "Hey, it gets you out of having to have breakfast with your Mom, too."
"Okay, good point. But brunch? Really?"
"It's the first thing that came to mind, calm down."
"I thought only old people called it brunch."
Lilah scowled. "You can call it whatever you want!"
"Late breakfast."
"Fine."
"Early lunch."
"Sure."
"Very early dinner."
My friend pursed her lips. "Are you done?"
"Methhead midnight snack."
Lilah sighed. "Okay, this conversation isn't going anywhere. Tomorrow, I'll come over at ten, and then we can head out. What do you wanna do? Bowling? Another movie?"
I furrowed my brow. "Huh? I thought we were going to eat."
"It doesn't have to be brunch, dumbass!" Lilah laughed. "I just said that to get both of us out of breakfast. As long as we leave and stay gone for an hour or two, it doesn't matter what we do. So I repeat, what do you want to do tomorrow?"
"I don't know, what do you want to do?"
Lilah rolled her eyes. "It's like talking to a brick wall, you know that? Except a wall is usually more decisive."
"Fuck you."
"That's the plan."
I raised an eyebrow in confusion, but Lilah smirked. "You know, since we're dating now, and that's what couples do. We're gonna need to be quiet since your mom is right downstairs."
"Lilah..." My cheeks burned red.
"No, actually, I'm supposed to be the one calling your name."
"Lilah!"
As it turned out, late breakfast was exactly what we did. Lilah sat across from me in the booth, slowly picking away at her omelette while I chowed down on my own club sandwich. As usual, we were both dressed in our hoodies and jeans like a pair of mannequins from a department clothing store. Still, something was different about Lilah. It was subtle.
"Are you wearing makeup?"
She batted her eyes. "Just a bit of foundation and eyeliner. Why, see something you like?"
"I don't think I've ever seen you wear makeup in my life. I'm just surprised."
"Well, if we're going to a wedding tomorrow, then I need some practice."
"During early lunch..."
Lilah rolled her eyes. The brown was augmented by the thin dark eyeliner. It looked good, even if it was different.
"Well, a girl needs makeup for a date."
"This isn't a date, Lilah." I sighed.
"Yeah, but your mom thinks so, and that's what matters."
"There is no way Mom saw that you were wearing makeup."
Lilah took another forkful of omelette and chuckled through her eggs. "She noticed the moment I walked in the door, dumbass."
"Fat chance."
"Hey, don't get mad because it took you half an hour to see it. Girls are a lot better at seeing makeup than guys."
"Yeah, but Mom? You were only in the house for like... fifteen seconds!"
"And during that time, she commented about it and said that I did a good job."
"When?" My brow furrowed.
"When you went back upstairs to grab your hoodie." Lilah said, matter-of-factly.
"You're pulling my leg."
"Am not. Here, look at that couple over there." Lilah pointed her gaze and I followed it to a pair that was sitting at a table towards the middle of the room. Why they weren't at one of the many open booths near the windows, I didn't know.
"What do you see about them?" Lilah asked.
"Well, a guy and a girl. They're having a very early dinner together."
"You're never going to call it brunch, are you?"
"Not on your life."
Lilah sighed. "Fine. The girl. Is she wearing makeup?"
I turned my attention away from the brown-haired guy, and towards his shorter companion. Her hair was scruffy and black, with a splattering of dark freckles on her face. All in all, she actually looked kind of similar to Lilah, if Lilah was about six inches shorter, had much paler skin, and had piercing blue eyes instead of brown. From this distance though, I couldn't make any confirmations on whether she was wearing makeup. She looked completely natural.
"No."
Lilah made a quiet noise like a buzzer for an incorrect answer. "It's subtle, but lipstick at the very least. If I had to guess, I would also say a bit of primer and a touch of foundation, but she's too pale for me to be sure."
"How can you tell?"
"Because I can. Now, about more serious matters-" Lilah turned back to me, but I kept my gaze fixed on the couple. The restaurant was quiet, and I could faintly overhear the boy talking, even though his voice was lowered.
"Tasha, this is- wow. How the hell are we going to pull this off?"
"I'll tell you when we get back home. Amelia's plan... it's a lot."
"Earth to Henry! You there?"
"Huh?" My attention was torn back to Lilah, who was staring with an amused expression.
"Did you hear anything I asked?"
"Uhh, yeah?"
"Bullshit. I asked what the plan was for the wedding."
I faltered. "We're... pretending to be a couple?"
Lilah rolled her eyes so wide it must have hurt.
"That's already been established, dumbass! I'm asking about everything else! When are we leaving? How are we travelling? What are we doing when we're at Niagara Falls? What's the plan for the hotel? What time is the wedding? When are we coming back?"
I winced at the assault of questions. "Okay, okay, I get it." I took a deep breath.
"As far as I know, we're driving down to Niagara, and we're leaving at noon tomorrow. Knowing Mom, we'll actually end up leaving at eleven, and she would want you to be packed and at our house by nine thirty. We'll be taking a detour to pick up Mom's friend on the way, because he lives over in Newmarket and Mom insisted that he could just join us instead of taking two different cars. When we're at Niagara, we're going to check into the hotel and hang out there until dinner, and then we're going to look at the falls."
"Ooh, sounds romantic." Lilah joked. I ignored the red in my cheeks.
"Anyway, then we go back to the hotel and in the morning we get ready for the reception. It starts at one, everyone is there by noon, Mom makes us be there for ten, you know the drill. The wedding ends after dinner, we stay at the hotel again, then head home in the morning."
"Alright, but that still leaves one question."
"What's that?"
"The hotel." Lilah raised her eyebrows like I should know what she was implying. I didn't.
"What about the hotel?"
Lilah's eyebrows dropped to an annoyed glare. "How many rooms, dumbass? Are both of us, your mother, and her date all staying in one room?"
"Uh, no." I said quickly. It was difficult to meet Lilah's eyes. There was no way she couldn't see the red in my cheeks. "Two rooms. One for Mom and her friend, and the other for us two."
"Okay, so we'll have to be quiet when we have sex if your mom is in the next room."
I decided not to speak, and buried my face into my sandwich. It tasted great just a minute ago, but now it tasted like shame. Lilah just smirked and pressed her opening.
"Who knows, maybe while you're railing me we'll be able to hear your mother and her date getting busy on the other side of the wall. You know, like mother, like son."
Lilah always had always been... blunt... but this vulgarity was new. Hearing her talk like that made all the blood in my body rush to my face. Well, that and one other place.
"Lilah! What the fuck?"
She had the balls to hold up her hands defensively, like I was the one crossing the line.
"Hey, if we're dating, your mom expects us to be having sex."
"Again, we're just pretending to date. And it's only for three days!"
"Three days? What about when we get back, genius? What's your brilliant scheme then?"
I winced into the few bites left of my sandwich. "I don't know. I'll think of something."
Lilah polished off the last of her omelette and grinned. "Well, you better think quickly. You done eating?"
"Yeah."
"Okay. I'm gonna go to the washroom, you can pay, and then we'll head out."
"Wait, why do I have to pay?" I protested.
Lilah smirked. "Because I know that your mom slipped you a fifty to foot the bill. Be right back!"
Lilah left the table, and I took one last bite of my sandwich before signalling the waiter. Meanwhile, I tried to calm down the erection that had formed in my pants. I really didn't need Lilah to see it when I stood up to leave. Why was she being so care-free now? Did... did she like the idea of us being together? Of us dating? Of us...?